Garden Variety Longing
‘For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. Matthew 17:25‘
In early October, I was listening to a podcast called Modern Love. It is a New York Times podcast focusing on stories of love in the 21st century. It’s not Wordle, but it’s still good.
I was listening to an episode called ‘Andrew Garfield Wants to Crack Open Your Heart’. Why would Spiderman want to inflict such harm upon me? As I listened, he spoke about a new movie he was doing, and his motivation for engaging with this movie called ‘We Live in Time’ was quite surprising:
“I was on an unofficial sabbath because I was tired and entering midlife…where I stood, wondering what we were doing being alive at this point…in the culture and civilisation, I didn’t have a good answer”.
A dark Wood
He knows how to party, right? As pretentious as this makes me sound, it reminded me of the words of Dante Alighieri’s poem, Inferno:
‘Midway upon the journey of our life
I found myself within a forest dark,
For the straightforward pathway had been lost.’
Andrew Garfield is an incredibly successful actor who is in the middle of his life wondering about purpose, meaning, significance… why are we here?
I wonder, as we throw out the mental maps that point us towards the good life; where meaning and fulfilment is found, and if our younger generations are experiencing this earlier than midlife.
I wonder, have we thrown out all the mental maps that point us towards the good life; where meaning and fulfilment is found? If so, are our younger generations experiencing this angst earlier than midlife?
In his book ‘The Surprising Rebirth of Belief in God’, Justin Brierley says that we are living in the midst of an identity and meaning crisis, felt acutely by younger generations who are under the social media microscope where the pressure is on to curate the right identity in the eyes of many watching people.

“You do You”
Unfortunately, we live in a moment where we are encouraged to be self-saturated. You do you. Follow your heart. Live your truth. We think that if we focus on ourselves, it will lead to a full life. But the words of a certain Jewish rabbi cut against the grain: whoever wants to hang onto their life will lose it.
It is a mystery that the way to experience fullness of life is not through focusing on ourselves but giving our lives away for the good of others.
Listen how Jesus finishes that thought:
“If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it.” Matthew 16:25
Self-Sacrificial Love
I would argue the deep longings of what we want from life isn’t found in the pursuit of self-fulfilment.
When Garfield (not the cat who loves lasagna, but the actor in the podcast) was asked about his longings, he responded that his longings were pretty garden variety:
“…to connect with life, to live courageously. I want to live true to myself and I want to make things that are beautiful and that connect with people, that give people some solace, some comfort.”
I love how he wants to use who he is; his strengths, abilities, limitations… all of himself for the good and comfort of others.
This is the way to a deeper sense of purpose. This is the way of Jesus: giving yourself away for the good of others out of a place of self-sacrificial love. I believe this is the garden variety longing that exists in the heart of every person across every generation.
Garden Variety Longing

Rev. Maddy Svoboda is the pastor at Summerhill Baptist, and represents the Greater Launceston churches on the Tasmanian Baptists Mission Leadership Team.
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